Wednesday, April 2, 2008

Sniffle, Snuffle.... Watch Out For The Snot!

We have two snot factories in the house today (otherwise known as Peggy and Sara) and they are VERY productive! O.K., I'm sure you didn't really want to know that, but I need some sympathy! We've gone through a lot of Kleenexes over the last few days. The snot has been accompanied by fevers, headaches, fatigue, and a dry cough for Sara. I don't know why, but when I'm sick, I just cannot bring myself to eat anything healthy. When I feel great, I'm all about the fruits and veggies. When I feel sick, that's the last thing I want. Which is the first thing I NEED! Instead, I've been eating things like ice cream and brownies, gummi bears, chips, and Oreos. Maybe it's because fruit and veggies have to be washed and cut up and I just don't have the energy when I'm not feeling well. Maybe I just don't have enough self-discipline to do what's right! Ouch! Maybe I'll just stop now! I'm in a weird mood....

Sara and I had a difficult time trying to have school today. I realized that it was partly my fault because I haven't been doing adequate planning. I have so many fun resources that I never take advantage of, simply because I never take the time to look through things and write down a day to use them. I just get stuck in a rut following the basic curriculum, and eventually Sara and I both get bored! Also, I'm feeling some panic because I feel we're behind and we don't have time for "extra" stuff. I try to cram in as much practical work as possible until Sara is overwhelmed and freaking out! So, after the tears and the schoolwork was over for the day, I sat down to do some thinking and planning. After looking through all the school stuff, I realized that all the extra things I felt would take too much time, could actually help me reach the goals I need to accomplish! Imagine that! When the school year started, we were still packing, moving, and then unpacking. We started school in October. I never got to plan or organize very much. I've been flying by the seat of my pants the whole year! It's been a never-ending cycle of emotions for me the whole year. I've realized how unfair everything has been for Sara. The pressure on me has been needless. I wish I had taken the time to plan earlier in the year, even if it meant a week off school. That week would have helped us to be so much more productive and efficient this year! I can't go back and change the past, but I'm determining to finish the year much stronger and organized. Please keep me accountable with this. Ask me if I've used my free time to plan or if I've wasted time on the computer! I need help and I need prayer to make these changes. I want to homeschool my children more than anything in the world. And I don't want to do it half-heartedly. Maybe this all sounds silly, but I needed to share these thoughts. School has not been the most positive thing in our lives this year and I feel sad about that. I want that to change and I know that by God's grace it can! Thanks for listening.


GE is me said...

Wow, thanks for the honesty. I like the blessing to me on the sidebar of your blog & have started doing that for my 2 girls. I'll be praying for you in regards to the homeschooling, but I'm sure you'll do fine. It is my desire to homeschool my girls(I have a couple years to get there as they just turned 3)as well. I'm not always the most organized person, but if you think about how much time is actually spent on educating children in a public school setting, I'm guessing you could probably take 2-3 days off a week & still be ahead of them.
I know of some homeschooling groups/sites if you are interested, let me know I'll be happy to share.
I understand the things you are saying, but not walking in those shoes yet, I'm sure I have a lot more to learn.
God Bless, -Gail

Uncle Rex and Aunt Debbie said...

Hang in there Peggy! Homeschooling isn't always easy, but is always worth it. I remember many days of frustration and tears, but also many days of fun with my guys, and I look back on those days so thankful to the Lord for what He accomplished in our guys. It sounds like you have already realized the importance of planning, and I know you had plenty of good examples from your own mom- look how well you turned out! We're praying for you!
Aunt Debbie

Karen said...

OK now I'm scared... Carter starts next year!! Can I cry now ;) You'll do fine.. better to see these things NOW than when she's in 12th grade!